The 3 Great Paradoxes of Sex

By Jet Ambrosio

Whenever appropriate, I try to preface my seminars, workshops and interviews by pointing early to the 3 Great Paradoxes of Sex. I have found this to be an effective way to easily shed light to the many puzzles and dilemmas of the sexual game. It is essential that everyone becomes aware of these issues, if only to avoid being tormented by them.

Note that all three (3) Paradoxes come from the 'land of good intentions', but still, they wreck merciless havoc on the lives of countless men and women.

I'm referring to the following: (1) The Paradox of Trying Too Hard (2) The Paradox of Thinking Too Much (3) The Paradox of the Simple Moves

(1) THE PARADOX OF TRYING TOO HARD

Great sex will always be about FLOW.

One doesn't need to press for it, trying too hard on any area will cause you to mess it up -- that's a guarantee. The tragedy is that most men don't even see this one coming and end up working against themselves -- the harder they try, the harder it becomes.

For example, one of the temptations of having too many tricks in the bag is to unleash them in a grand overflow and put on a show. Needless to say, you'll reek of the 'trying too hard' vibe. Instead of dazzling Eve, you'll turn her off -- for the vibe masks a specific fear -- the fear of inadequacy, that nagging feeling of not being good enough.

You're afraid she won't have a great time unless you pleasure the brains out of her, so you feel compelled to unleash every physical technique to compensate for a personal issue.

Like I said, this will backfire. You don't need to do everything -- don't be an overeager yes-man. The rookie mistake here is trying too hard to please every woman, every time, with the hopes of being the best she's ever had. You'll end up pleasing nobody in no time.

Instead, learn to lean back and let sexual excellence come to you.

(2) THE PARADOX OF THINKING TOO MUCH

Great sex is always UNCONSCIOUS, it's not logical or rational.

The bedroom is not the place to think, and the absolute worst time to contemplate your insecurities, sexual hang-ups and skills. Deal with them BEFORE your next carnal encounter and AFTER your last one. . .NEVER DURING. Calibrate. . . but don't thresh-out psychological issues in the heat of things. Self-consciousness and self-talk pull you out of the moment and into a negative spiral where you become sexually ineffective and out of touch.

Don't be overly concerned with the mechanics and metrics of intercourse -- like the exact pressure or angle of your hand, or the direction of your thrusts. Stop thinking -- focus on your partner and immerse in the moment.

Don't plan every move as if sex is a series of perfectly executed maneuvers. When you over-think things, you'll mess up. The best crane operators don't analyze every step. . .they just do it, the moves have become 2nd to nature.

If you think too much, I assure you that the sex will get worse -- instead of enjoying, you'll be too busy figuring out the next best move.

Just enjoy the process, take it easy and don't be too hard on yourself.

It goes without saying that one doesn't have to gun for sexual perfection. . .there's no such thing. Afford yourself some mistakes and don't make a big deal out of it.

This is very, very important.

And lastly,

(3) THE PARADOX OF THE SIMPLE MOVES

Great sex will always about the SIMPLE MOVES.

It is the aggregate of simple things, done in the right way and at the right time, that makes the world of difference.

Great sex isn't about big moves or magic techniques -- it's about the snowballing of easy to do maneuvers, with the understanding that it's the small things that truly matter. It's not about making extensive changes to your game, but simply tweaking it.

For example, it's learning to feel not just with your hands, but with your fingertips. It's being in-tune not just for her screams, but even to her breathing. Not just about writhing bodies but little twitches .

Great sex is simple, ('simple' doesn't mean 'boring'), it's not replete with shock-and-awe. The road to sexual greatness is not some hidden mythic trick, for the most elegant and effective moves have never been kept secret, they have always been there.

They just have been overlooked. . .if not forgotten. Being unpretentious, the most powerful sex moves easily pass off as insignificant. They are obvious -- one can readily see why they work. And yet you have to ask yourself why the average guy hasn't utilized them with full abandon, why they haven't run with it.

The most important sex moves are the simplest ones.

Mr. Jet Ambrosio is the acclaimed author of the EVE TRILOGY -- the indispensable Manual for Men. BOOK (1): SEX!: The Biggest SHE-crets BOOK (2): The Book of Forgotten SEX MOVES BOOK (3): BEYOND PENETRATION Check them out at http://www.evetrilogy.com . . . but only if you got 7 minutes to spare!