By Gerson C. Borges
A love relationship is one of, if not the most important things to keep us happy and mentally stable. We have invested a great deal of effort in the starting, nursing, and improving that love relationship. For a few months or maybe even a few years, things seemed to run pretty smooth and we felt contented, realized and in seventh heaven , so to speak. But somehow, after that golden period the enchantment starts to subside. At first almost unnoticed, but after a while, a 'cooling era' becomes evident. Little by little it seems that the daily chores and all other trivia of the day by day life begins to take priority over the consideration, affection and tenderness that lovers have for each other.
Why is it? And why does it have to be like that?
The very essence of why this situation starts is exactly that the general cooling which becomes the rule rather than the exception, makes people directly involved lose the strength and the stamina necessary to react to that status. Somehow, people involved in this type of relationship seem to think that the other partner is beginning to act differently and that they are responsible for the distancing from each other that is happening.
It does not have to be that way. Proof of that are the many thousands of couples who manage to keep their love affair going for decades. Many times, just like the vows made at their wedding ".. to death do us part". On the other side of the coin however, are the much greater number of couples who do not stay together anywhere near that. Obviously that feat is not is not an easy one to achieve. It will take a lot of hard work, a lot of giving, and a lot of understanding, topped with an obstinate will to win the battle against accommodation and giving up.
But if you consider the fact the once you loved that person dearly and it seemed then that you would love him/her forever, you will realize that him or her had everything you wanted and loved about your love partner.
In the majority of the cases your partner does have all the qualities required to keep you happy and in love indefinitely. The problem lies almost always in the lack of ability of one or both to understand that it takes two to fight for to the continuance of that relationship end of the pleasure that it once gave them.
So now, what can the both of you do to save, or reinstate the happy relationship you both had before?
Well, it takes some hard evaluation of what you have been doing and what you have stopped doing. Just remember that your partner has what it takes to make you happy and that you also have what it takes to make him or her happy. To get things back on track, start doing a complete evaluation on how your life together was in the beginning. Bring back to action all the tenderness, the companionship, the caring you had for each other, and especially the sex life you use to have. Of course, with the passing of time, some of the things you did have to be revamped. Its a known fact that a constant repetition of anything, ends up making it monotonous and kind of boring. So you have to find a way, through books and specialized magazines, and the internet which has a large number of sites on this subject that can give you both in text articles and in videos, which can give you a pretty good idea on new things or actions you can implement to improve and put the zest back into the relationship.
Here are some tips: start holding hands again, as often as you can. Do some long walk together holding hands. This is also good to improve your health, which is another plus. In good bye kisses and back from work kisses, don't do little peckers anymore. Regardless if you are late to work or not, look at each other on the eye and kiss affectionately for a few seconds. Do that every time you can. If at first your partner seems not to respond the same way, keep doing it. You'll see that he or she will end up corresponding it.
Tip number two: you will have to sacrifice on some things that may be very deary to you, such as ball games for men and socializing for the ladies. There are ways to 'have your cake and eat too'. Just tape your game and watch it later for the guys, and take your guys with you to socialize, if he cares to go. Also card games at the club or at somebody else's place have to be limited to a minimum. Talk to your partner to have a card game at your place, with her participation, if she cares too. At least this way there won't be so many times in which you're away from each other.
Tip number three, and this is very important: get organized and set apart a time for unwinding and resting every time you think that he or she will be wanting to have a night of privacy with each other. Have a couple of drinks. No more than a couple, as too much alcohol will have an opposite effect than the one you want, as it will probably rend you unsuitable for a good sex session. These sessions should happen at the very least three times a month, but once or twice a week would be much better.
Tip number four: be prepared to perform excellent and satisfying sex. By that I mean a long foreplay and especially a lot of hot kissing.You should start by caressing each other tenderly. Don't be shy, show your partner how much you love and care for him/her. And yes say to each other the magical and eternal word: "I love you". Don't take for granted that he/she knows already that you love him/her. Say it again. As many times as you feel you should. And when sex itself starts, go slow and prolong it for as long as you can.
As for the sex itself, you probably have a pretty good idea on how to do it.
But if you want a special article about it, I'll be doing it next week. See you then. And good luck with the task of falling in love again with your partner. Believe me, there is nothing else better than that. I can tell for sure, as I, myself have been through it and was successful.
By: Gerson Borges |
0 comments:
Post a Comment