By Howard Guy
Marriages usually start out with wild passion, sex and seduction and an intimacy that unites a man and a women in love and understanding that goes beyond all other relationships they have ever had. Sadly, many do not stay that way with a reported 18% of becoming passionless marriages that have sex less than 10 times a year; add to this the 50% divorce rate and we have an interesting link and a serious problem.
While statistics tell us the situation now what has caused them? What are the reasons that two people so in love can lose their drive for physical intimacy? Here are some of the most common reasons which may surprise you.
1. Lack of physical attraction
This is actually the least powerful reason but listed first because it is the first thing that comes to most peoples minds when they think of a loss of sex drive, that one or both persons in a marriage have let themselves go and no longer appeal sexually to their partner. This can be true but is not real reason only an excuse in most cases.
2. Stress
Stress is a major problem in modern society, highly stressful jobs can sap a persons strength and energy but not only that they can build a pattern of coping that involves shutting other stressful things such as family. Sex may not seems stressful but the onus to be a good lover sometimes makes this worse and the mental capacity to be romantic can be too hard when there is too much stress.
3. Fear
Fear is a strange thing and covers a very broad spectrum: fear of performance, fear of failure, disgust of their own body, fear from sexual abuse in he past ... there are many things that can give a person some form of anxiety disorder when it comes to sexual relations. These may have always been there or they might be something that has developed over time.
4. Boredom
Not as simple as it sounds, spicing things up can always turn things around but this is not about sex tips, is a marriage has become passionless it is a deeper issue that means an emotional divide has occurred between spouses and one or both can not appreciate the other as they once did because the connections seems to have been lost leading to an almost brother-sister relationship that has no excitement.
5. Distrust
Many marriages go through some problems that can lead to a loss of trust which if not completely healed can be like a bleeding wound that eventually saps one persons level of attraction to their partner as they come to dislike them even if they do not communicate it.
If any of this sounds familiar and you want to understand more about how your partner thinks and reacts in a sexless marriage then click below for more information including the 5 things you must NOT do if you ever want to fix the situation. |
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