By Kacy Carr
Who should lead the way on the first sexual encounter, the boy or girl? Before answering this question it has to be established if the boy and girl are at an age deemed appropriate for readiness. In saying that, there is no true age for first time sexual intercourse. Of course we are not talking babes, but teens that hopefully are aware of what is involved when indulging in teen sex. Okay, I know, get on with it and less of the same jargon because you have heard it all before. Like it not you need to hear it again, readiness is when you know of the consequences that rise from having unprotected sex.
Let's cut to the chase and think condom. Condoms are a safe form of contraception protecting against unwanted pregnancies or catching sexually transmitted diseases. Now that's out of the way, the answer to the question of who should make the first move is - one that has no answer. There was a time that we saw man as the leader, not only in sexual moves but in most other things. Today we live in times where women go Dutch on a date; women priests preach the bible and female rulers governing countries. Women are more upfront nowadays i.e. no holds barred. Either gender can make the first move, there is no set ruling. Making a move on a first teen sex experience, will depend on the situation and the individual themselves. If the boy is shy and the girl not so, then it is a possibility she will lead the way, or vice versa.
It is in your best interest to speak with your parents of your intentions. Parents are the two most honest people in your life that will give sound advice. There may not be happy with your teen sex exploits, nonetheless they will be there for you, if you go against their better judgment.
Are you unsure what readiness is, if so, a family planning clinic or your GP will have the information to enlighten you? Having sexual intercourse for the first time can be a special experience, but it can also involve complications, as pointed out earlier (pregnancy STDs.) There are also the emotional disturbances i.e. realizing your sexual partner is not one of which you are attracted to later down the line.
It's against the law to have underage sex. Age varies for different countries. The legal age does make you ready for sex. You are the only person who can judge if you're ready, get a second opinion, and ask mom or dad. You must not be pushed into to doing something you are not comfortable with. Age of consent for having sexual intercourse in most states of America ranges between 16 and 18. In Britain and India it's 16. In some Muslim countries, sex is illegal unless married. These age pointers may have changed so check them out. The reason for age laws is to protect. It is a law specially devised with children in mind. Older people take advantage of the immature so it is a necessary ruling.
You have to want this for yourself.
Don't be duped by your partner when he/she says
1 If you love me
2 All your friends are doing it
3 It will make our relationship stronger
4 You'll have to do it sometime
5 I'll only put it in for a second, "yeah right" don`t listen unless you trust your partner. Think carefully about words as such if uttered.
If you have only just met your partner, trust will not have matured yet, so wait. Sex can leave you feeling vulnerable, is this - what you want, a partner who has their wicked way with you and disappears into the night? Good sex happens with someone you love and trust, are content with, and who you can talk to openly about your feelings.
It's natural to feel an embarrassed the first time you have teen sex. Sexual intercourse mess ups on your first attempt is normal. If alcohol spurs you on in thought, then it can also spur you on to act on your way of thinking, don't let drink be the decider of readiness A lot of people lose their virginity when they're drunk, and then live their life with regret. Ask yourself questions, e.g. how sex works, how and why a woman can get pregnant? Remind yourself of sexually transmitted infections? Remember, sex is about both parties being ready, not just one sided. It helps to talk things through with your partner. If you fall on deaf ears, forget it. For sex to work and prove satisfying, you both have to be willing and ready. Different cultures denote different beliefs in relation to sex. Religion may have you abstain; an act of rebellion is not the solution. If anything goes wrong, you face a difficult situation losing respect and support of your family.
First time teen sex can have you anxious about losing your virginity, so more the reason to be certain that you have the right partner, as there is no turning the clock back.
UK statistics on sexually transmitted infections are based on analysis made at genitourinary medicine (GUM) clinics. These might undervalue correct frequency as diagnoses made in other healthcare settings are not included, and infections such as genital Chlamydia and gonorrhea often show no symptoms and remain undiagnosed.
1 Study shows sexual attitudes in the UK, 10.8% of men and 12.6 %of women aged 16-44 were treated for sexually transmitted infections.
2 In 2007 report, 397,990 new sexually transmitted infection diagnoses at GUM clinics in Great Britain showed an increase of 63% in 1998.
3 There was a 6% rise between 2006 and 2007
4 Genital Chlamydia infection figures rose the highest. Between 1998 and 2007 genital Chlamydia increased by 150%, genital herpes by 51%and syphilis by 1,828%.
5 New cases of gonorrhea in 2007 decreased for 5 consecutive years.
In 2007, a staggering million plus sexual health screenings took place in UK GUM clinics , 10% more than in the year of 2006.
Chlamydia
1 Genital infection (Chlamydia) remains most familiar bacterial sexually transmitted infection, with 121,986 diagnoses in 2007, a rise of 7 % since 2006.
2 Total accumulation of new diagnoses was 201.3 per 100,000 populations.
3 The highest diagnoses were among women aged 16-19 (1,423 per 100,000) and 20-24 (1,179.3 per 100,000) and men aged 20-24 (1,182.5 per 100,000.)
4 Age group 16-24 accounted for 65%.
5 This data does not include cases diagnosed through the national screening programs in England.
Acquiring accurate estimates on Chlamydia is hard as this infection is frequently asymptomatic and is liable to pass undetected.
Genital warts
1 Genital warts, a viral sexually transmitted infection. 89,838 diagnoses in the UK 2007, a rise of 7% since 2006.
2 Total accumulation of new diagnoses was 148.3 per 100,000 populations.
3 Again the highest rates of diagnoses showed in women aged 16-19 (830.1 per 100,000) and men aged 20-24 (815.2 per 100,000.)
Gonorrhea
1 There were 18,710 diagnoses of gonorrhea in the UK in 2007, a fall of 1% since 2006.
2 Total rate of new diagnoses was 30.9 per 100,000.
3 The highest rates of diagnoses were in women aged 16-19 (136.9 per 100,000) and men aged 20-24 (174.2 per 100,000.)
4 Men accounted for 69 % of all diagnoses, with nearly a third of these occurring in gay men
Syphilis
1 There were 2,680 diagnoses of syphilis in the UK in 2007, with minor change since 2006.
2 Men accounted for 89 % of diagnoses; the highest rate happened in the 25-34 age groups (18.3 per 100,000.)
3 In 2007, 62 % of all syphilis diagnoses in males were among MSM.
An untreated STD can be fatal; of course this will not affect you, because readiness has you thinking "condoms." Teen sex without using a condom has your sensible friends believing you have a death wish.
