The Erotica Make-Over

By Mel Candea

Even saying or writing the word "porn," creates a stir. Whether it's the misnamed book Porn For Women, which shows shirtless men doing housework with bubbles saying "I just want to listen to you, sweetheart!" or a music website calling itself Noiseporn, people jump on it. The issue has always been a contentious one. Most men have had a girlfriend or partner complain at some point in their lives. Most women have watched at least one film, feeling a bit confused and turned-off after. Is it simply that men like it and women don't, or that it's emotionally degrading to women as a whole?

Let's define the terms first. In general, male pornography is geared towards men as a fantasy. The women are impeccably beautiful, with a fawning adoration for the most average-looking Joe. The men in the films never suffer from lack of erection or premature ejaculation. And, of course, there's the always-included money shot. The point of the films is usually targeting masturbation and release. No more and no less. Women don't find this erotic, which isn't shocking in the least. They find the actors tacky and plastic or unattractive. The skimpy storylines are unbelievable. They have nothing to identify with in the films or photos. It's not that they need a naked romance book (also known as soft-core) but women would like to watch something with a little more sincerity.

Enter the online industry. Where women were fairly loathe to enter a XXX shop or publicly buy DVDs, the internet has increased the interest of women in erotica. There are now hundreds of sites for women, by women, streamlined to the female fantasy. They have pictures of men or of couples, stories that step a long way away from the torn bodice. And films catering to singletons, couples and lesbians. It might seem a little surprising that 1/3 of all online-porn watchers are women. Less surprising is how quickly this aspect of the industry is growing, with female directors, scriptwriters and producers coming into their own. The stories are more fleshed-out (pardon the pun) with diverse body types and lifestyles. The male actors are attractive. Film titles now include words like passionate, seductive and sweet. In the same way that male porn is a fantasy, this too is fantasy. But...it's for women.

There are even awards given for best "genuine female satisfaction" at the Feminist Porn Awards yearly. New terminology is becoming the norm, such as "Jilling off." On the whole, the taboo of women being just as free with their fantasies and sexuality is slowly being lifted. This new porn no longer "makes sexism sexy," but makes sex sexy for women to enjoy beyond the bedroom. Of course, it isn't for everyone. There will always be those that find any pornography degrading and insulting. Some consider it fodder for creating sexual deviants or an internal violation of both the people in the films and the viewers. They have the right not to watch it, read it or see it. Just as those that do have an interest should be allowed the freedom of access and discovery. Now more women have hundreds of choices available to them, rather than the paltry previous pickings of "this one doesn't have so much Jack-hammering..." It's an industry that's guaranteed to grow, and with it, the stereotypes may finally diminish.

I'm an American living in Europe. I've been writing for almost 12 years, with a high level of grammar proficiency (I taught English grammar for 9 years). I'm keen on researching - it's nice learning and then being able to express it to others. I also love writing - on almost any subject. Email: Melony73@yahoo.com